First Date No-No’s – 5 Points you Must Know

Published: 07th July 2009
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A first date is nerve-wrecking and exciting at the same time, because it's all about making the appropriate first impression and in some ways setting the standard for what's to come. There's also the added pressure of knowing the fact that this is make or break, as the two of you will either hit it off or you won't. An important point to keep in mind is simply to be yourself, because putting on a show or an act is seriously easy for your new date to see through, and apart from being hugely unattractive it's also a massive turn-off. There are a lot of first date no-no's out there, some perhaps more obvious than others. Let's take a quick look at five common first date mistakes that should truly be avoided at all costs.

1. Talk, Talk, Talk
Communication is essential to make any relationship progress, and the first time you meet someone you can usually feel whether the two of you are on the same wavelength or not. Whatever you talk about, make sure it doesn't involve kids, marriage or ex-partners. If you tell a man you meet for the first time that you are dying to get married and make babies, he is going to run for his life. Or if you tell a woman you meet for the first time that your ex-girlfriend was hot but somewhat stupid, she is going to walk out there and then. Bragging is never attractive, and neither is spending the whole first date talking about yourself and not listening or showing interest in what the other person has to say. Another first date no-no is answering your cell phone. You should really switch it off and give your date your full attention throughout the whole evening.

2. Don't Let him Pick You Up - Meet on Neutral Territory
A huge first date mistake is to ask your new date to pick you up. You really don't want him to know where you live; after all you don't know this person well yet and he could actually be a stalker with a freaky foot-fetish or a psycho with a thirst for blood. Besides, you want to be able to escape should you feel the need to, which means that making your own way there and back is the safest option. So be a sensible girl and tell him you will meet him somewhere. It's always better to go to a restaurant rather than a pub, as the noise levels are lower and you'll get a chance to talk. There's nothing more annoying than shouting at each other over loud music or having to stand by the bar because all the tables are taken. Because what you really want to do on your first date is to sit down, relax and get to know each other. Don't choose a fancy restaurant, however, as you might end up having to pay if your new date is as tight as duck's behind. Letting him pick the venue is always a good idea, as this will give you an indication of his decision-making abilities, his confidence and his taste.

3. Don't Argue About the Bill, Let him Pay
Arguing about who's paying the bill is never a good idea. If you are a rich feminist, however, you might agree beforehand that you are going to split the bill. But if he wants to pay, and still insists after you have offered once to contribute, please just let it go. Bruising his male ego by flashing money in his face is a big first date no-no, so don't force it. Besides, who doesn't like a gentleman who wants to treat you? Enjoy it while you can!

4. Don't Do the Deed
It doesn't matter how hot he is or how long it has been, jumping into bed with him on the first date is always a huge mistake - a mistake you'll more than likely end up regretting. Get to know each other first, and let chemistry do its magic! There's nothing wrong with a bit of a build-up, it's definitely always worth it in the end. By all means, let him give you a little peck on the cheek when you say goodnight, but don't invite him in for coffee. In the long run he will respect you more for waiting. And he'll also be eager to see you again very soon - if the two of you have really hit it off.

5. Don't try to be someone you're not
Getting dressed up to the nines in a lacy red dress and sky-high stilettos is going to make him focus on your body rather than your face and what you have to say. Men are easily distracted, so although you want to make a good first impression, don't overdo it. Wear something sexy but sophisticated, and don't look like you made too much of an effort to impress. On the other hand, don't rock up in a casual jeans and t-shirt either. It's going to make him think you're not keen at all. And most importantly, be yourself one hundred percent on a first date. Trying to be someone you're not is only going to backfire in the end, and will definitely not encourage a long-term relationship. And after all, if a guy doesn't like you for who you are, what's the point in wasting time on him?


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